Friday, August 26, 2011

bye mel-rae.

hey guys. new blog.

Monday, July 18, 2011

B word.

so lately i've been a real B word. k whatever don't jump to conclusions! i'm talking about the B word... BRIDEZILLA. sorry everyone. sorry fiance. sorry family. mostly sorry girl on the phone that didn't know what the hell i was talking about and i called you an idiot. sorry.

well i'm wondering if i can blame it on the birth control. yeah that's probably what it is. but only i can say that. cause if you say that i will rip your freakin head off.

then i kinda wanna blame it on the lack of sleep. but then that would mean i have to take responsibility for not going to bed on time. and no way do i take responsibility for anything negative now a days. i only take responsibility for cute ideas that i actually didn't necessarily come up with. but then maybe they were my ideas? i can't keep all those wedding blogs straight! who's to say i didn't come up with paper flowers on my own!

i could blame it on the weather, yeah? like sunny days and snow cones make every girl way mean.... right?? DAMMIT!

Friday, July 15, 2011

our first place.

trying to find decent married housing in provo is hard. sooo many sketch places. like how do people live in some of those places? i dunno. last week we found the greatest place to live. well i thought it was the greatest. danny could barely fit in that cupboard of an apartment. but i LOVED it. and so after much eye batting and please oh please's danny agreed to live the next year of his life bent in half. cool. so we called them to tell them we wanted it and.... it was already SOLD. wahhhhh. i can't remember if i cried. but i probably did. so the search continued. everyone said we would find something even better. danny was secretly happy but pretended that he was so sad :((((. so then this week we have looked at like 100 places. okay maybe like 10. okay maybe like 5. but still. let's just say that pictures people post online are not the same as in real life. we were let down A LOT. but this has a happy ending of course or else i wouldn't be blogging right now i would be being pissed. so anyway we took our lunch break one day to look at yet another place, we had no expectations, we drove by, and figured there was no way it could be that cool vintage style house and that we had to have the wrong address. we walked up, still not excited. but the second the landlord opened the door i couldn't stop pinching danny. like the good kind of pinch. like hey i want this place. i love it! we loved it. we practically were throwing money at the guy so that we would let us live there. but that wasn't good enough. he did a background check and credit check. we didn't know that's not normal? anyway, i guess he wanted to make sure we're not criminals. but we were approved!! and we have the keys! yay! we love our little place and can't wait to start our lives together there.

Friday, July 8, 2011

for you.

i needed this. maybe you do too?

Tuesday, May 31, 2011



yesterday you were born. so i guess you could say it was your birthday. yesterday was your birthday. did you know it was the prettiest day? so pretty. just like you. it was so nice of you to come on a holiday. i didn't have work, so i got to be with your mama all day. oh your mama. she was so strong. she was so beautiful. she was so happy to welcome you into the world. we were all so happy to welcome you into the world. did you know i accidentally missed your actual entrance to the world? i didn't know you'd come here so fast. i left to go get your grandpa, and well, five minutes after i left, your grandma called me and said "listen!" and then i heard you cry. it wasn't an annoying cry, so don't worry. it was the most perfect cry i have ever heard. i cried too. the ugly kind of cry though. we raced back to welcome you. you were so tiny, and, you're probably sick of hearing this, but YOUR HAIR. your hair was amazing. so much of it. you let me hold you for about a minute, but you were starving. looking everywhere for some food. so i had to give you back to mama. oh your mama. can i say it again? she was BEAUTIFUL! beaming. glowing actually. i couldn't stop staring. she's amazing, that mom of yours. she has been waiting for you her whole life. she was born to be a mom. you should feel lucky. you are lucky.

i love you so much already. i'm a baby hog. i held you this afternoon for two hours straight. i think i'll hold you tonight for at least three. i gave you a hundred kisses already. hopefully you like kisses. i'm so happy you're here little el.

your aunt.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

hi again.

whoa. what the crap. how the heck. i am so confused. just kidding, i'm not confused. but i feel kinda crazy right now. i've been at my cubicle for seven hours straight. and i've already organized the treats next to my desk like five times. so i'm pretty sure there is nothing left to do. except eat this fruit by the foot.

wahhhh fruit by the foot makes me think of ali. she loves fruit by the foot. i should have given her some before she left for north carolina for THE WHOLE SUMMER. what am i gonna do. crap. i gotta be positive. buuuut.

i'm planning a wedding all the sudden. how am i old enough for this?? actually i'm old enough (come on, i live in provo, i'm an old maid round these parts). how am i organized enough for this is a better question. like i've never planned a thing in my life. we already got our clothes for the day of the event. and now we're like "ALL DONE!!" but then i guess we're not. i guess there is a lot to do. how was i suppose to know how involved this whole thing is?? good thing i know so many crafty folk. they'll help me.

all last week i was miserable to be around. i'm sorry to anyone who encountered me. it's just that my computer wasn't letting me watch america's next top model. or glee. or the voice. WTF. i was pissed.

i pulled out my eyelash extensions last week. on accident. but not really. like it wasn't an accident. i spent and hour and a half on my bathroom counter pulling them out. in my defense, i didn't have my contacts in and anyone who wears contacts knows that you do crazy things when you aren't wearing them. so now i have no eyelashes. everyone does double takes when they look at me. and not the good kind of double takes. trust me.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

he liked it.

well everybody probably knows by now. but i got engaged :). i am trying to refrain from using too many exclamation points. i'm pretty sure i've used more in the last 3 days than i have in my entire life. but i just can't help it. like it's painful right now to use periods. anywayyyyyyyyy.... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ah! seriously, i am so happy. the happiest i've ever been. danny and i will be wed on august 13, 2011 in the timpanogous temple! we are so excited to start our life together. i am the luckiest. now i just gotta figure out how i'm gonna hone in on my homemaking skills so that we can stay alive for the next 50+ years. oops.

Friday, April 8, 2011


happy friday ya'll. here are some things to keep in mind this weekend:

don't visit it's just not worth it. like their clothes are great but their ads are trash. trust me, i'm a marketing major, i know stuff like that. seriously trash, not even cool. like you might call me a prude, and you'd be right, but i am saving you all the awkwardness that is american apparel advertisements.

get a haircut. or maybe a manicure. but not a pedicure, cause it's snowing outside.

download the instagram app. really. do it. thanks ali.

eat a lot of carbs.

k bye.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

secret's out.

k whatever. if you don't know already, now you know. I AM IN LOVE! oops. how could i not be? look.....

what a babe. leather jacket AND a tie? like i'm pretty sure he fell from heaven. and he is the funniest and the nicest. and he puts up with me every day. so that says a lot i'm pretty sure.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

jane's lame.

anybody wanna know what the worst feeling is? hearing someone talk about you that doesn't know you can hear them. yeah... that happened to me. this morning. but the thing is i'm not even pissed about it. or maybe i am. i just feel bad for her because i guess she doesn't realize that cubicle walls are not like real walls. like you can hear through them, and they don't go all the way up to the ceiling. so maybe i should let her know. also i should let her know that her voice carries. so even if she were two cubicles away (instead of one, pffft) i could probs still hear her. and maybe i should also tell her that if she MUST talk mean about someone to use a secret code name. like maybe my nickname could be jane and she could have said "jane is a real lame-o" and i could have went on with my day. wracking my brain right now thinking "who the heck is jane??" and "i'll be sure to steer clear of jane the lame-o."

anyway, other than that, today should be good. i think.

Friday, March 25, 2011


today i was running so so so sossosoosoooo late for work. but i wasn't even stressing. i took my time and arrived at 8:33 exactly. no one was here. it's 9:15 and still no one is here. i must have missed the memo. my email isn't working. so i literally really could have missed the memo.

jersey shore finale was pretty great. my favorite part was when snookie said she's gonna run for president. and then everyone would be tan. and all the radio stations would play house music. hahahahhahaha.

i played doodle jump on the ipad. now i want an ipad. weird things motivate me.

has anyone had a protein burger from in n out? i would recommend trying one. they are really good and don't make your arteries feel as clogged. also i would recommend getting that animal sauce, it comes in a little package thing, and dipping your fries in it. your arteries will feel a bit more clogged, but still manageable. should i start reviewing fast food restaurants on here? would that be beneficial? i could be like a fast food connoisseur. i'll think about it.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

t shirt time.

just so you know you should never ever trust GPS on the iPhone. especially anywhere south of provo. you will end up lost, or worse, way pissed.

i am not patient by nature. when i am, i am lying, or really really tired.

protein shakes are not good. no matter what anyone says. i will never think they are good. this morning on my way to work i tried a peach flavored one, thinking maybe, just maybe it would be better than the rest. WRONG. i dry heaved for 10 minutes straight. like thinking about it now makes me break into a cold sweat.

the temple is the best place to go. under any circumstance. even if you can't go inside. i have ran around the temple. read a book on the grass. even just parked my car and stared at it's beauty. (yeah i think the provo temple is beautiful, obvi). going there will change your life. swear.

i have been so thankful for my little sister this week. she is seriously the greatest person. i love her but i might love baby girl eloise more. is that possible?

jersey shore finale (i had to google that word, i thought it was spelled finally, what the) tonight!!!! i think that's the first time i've ever used exclamation points on my blog. i'll do better. anyway so yeah, T SHIRT TIME! if you don't like/watch jersey shore, stop reading right now, go to, and spend the rest of your day in heaven.

writing in a journal is the hardest thing i've ever tried to do. i feel like i have to be all formal. and it is the most awkward thing for me. and i find myself only writing about a certain someone. exciting for me, potentially boring for my future offspring. cause they'll be the ones reading it, right? and that's the worst part for me, the fact that when i write in my journal all i think about are my kids reading it and being like "wow, mom was a real weirdo." so then i start being more weird and more awkward cause i feel like my children are judging me. is this normal? please tell me someone relates?

k well see yuh.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Wednesday, March 2, 2011


did you ever notice that everything is at it's best right before you have to change it? like, hair? i swear my hair is it's very best right before i have to get it cut. or, mascara? the best consistency right before it's empty. orrrr..... well actually those are the only two examples i can think of.

i never used to honk my horn at crazy drivers/people. the other day i honked three times in one ten minute drive. is this what growing up is?

i have an iPhone. i've only paid for two apps. doodle jump and sally's spa. the other ones were all free. you can tell a lot about a person by what they will spend 99 cents on. i think. wait, am i cheap?

let me brag for a second. but i have the best mom. she made me a FEAST on monday night and then we watched the bachelor. but i don't think we stopped talking the whole time. she's funny and fun. and smart. and pretty. and a lot of other things but i can't say cause she will probably get all shy and humble. but really, she's the best.

i've watched despicable me 15 times in the past two weeks. at first by choice, but then by force.

8 am is really early for work. shouldn't the workday start at 9? seems more logical.

provo has a beach resort. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. actually it is pretty fun. i take back my laughter.

and finally, let me talk about one last thing. yesterday was ron weasly's birthday and i didn't even know until 9 pm. i was too caught up in bieber's birthday. i'm a 13 year old girl. whoops.

Monday, February 28, 2011


i may have overestimated my situation. turns out no one is even pissed at me! PHEW! i slid right under the radar. in fact i may just be a modern day hero.

thanks for all the prayers, texts, emails, handwritten letters, flowers, candy, and love.

ps. i'm a brat.


i got involved in drama today. and i'm STRESSING! what was i thinking? oh man oh man oh man. i mostly steer clear of my roommates and their drama, but today i just exploded and totally spilled secrets. crap. crap. crap. oops. whoops. girls are so freaking scary. i'm scared.

pray for me.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

i bought a new satchel.

apparently people read my blog. cause like everyone is telling me they miss me writing stuff. whatever.

so i'm not the type of girl who talks a lot about food or what i eat. okay, yeah right. i am totally the type of girl that does that. i realized the other day that if there is one thing i hate it's when girls say "i'm not the type of girl that...." because usually what comes after is totally the type of girl they are. i also hate when girls talk bad about girls as a whole. so it's kinda a catch 22 for me. should i delete this paragraph and start over? anyway, back to me. so these last two weeks i have been the most hungry i've ever been. i think i have had five meals a day. and when i say meals i mean wendy's.

last week i went on a vacation. to vegas. does that count as a vacation? yeah, so i went on a vacation and it was so great. we had the time of our lives. i usually wouldn't use the word magical to describe anything in nevada, but really, it was magical. vegas is kinda classy now. kinda. okay like an area of the strip is classy. i know i've probably told everyone this already but i ran like a mile in high heels. it's one of the most miserable experiences. but then looking back you feel way proud and tell everyone you know. anyway so the reason i was running is because we were way late for the cirque de soliel show the "o". needless to say we made it in time, after i took off my shoes (gross) and ran through the bellagio (classy). i also lost a stupid amount of money at the penny slots. i was like a child. danny would give me a dollar to keep me entertained and i would somehow lose it in one second. so then he gave me ten dollars and i lost it in less than two minutes. best/worst part about it was that my slots of choice were wolf run and 100 wolves. oops.

back to food. mom don't read what's coming next. so i haven't been grocery shopping in like two months. that is real. i don't know how i've survived. actually i totally know how i've survived. i'm like a seagull nowadays. like taking food from strangers and pooping on you unexpectedly. okay that was gross. i take it back. danny has kept me alive. thanks dan. k mom you can read again.

my baby sister is so cute with her prego belly boop bop. for real. if you haven't yet, hang out with her. baby girl is the best. i felt her move the other day. what the. she was like going crazy in there. she's a lot like me already. also her name is eloise! i have been keeping that secret for what feels like my whole life. but finally erika announced it cause i think she knew i couldn't hold it in much longer. she knows me well.

has anyone been watching the bachelor? i have. i won't go into detail about it though. i liked michelle. okay, there, i said it. throw tomatoes at me or whatever.

well that's all i think. bu bye.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Friday, January 21, 2011

last time i checked.

does anyone else have sweaty eyelids? well i guess it's not technically sweat, apparently eyelids don't have sweat glands. anyway, hopefully someone knows what i mean. well i've struggled with sweaty lids my whole life. it basically makes it pretty hard to have eye makeup on cause it creases so bad and you just look crazy. and then finally my bff gave me this awesome urban decay eyelid potion stuff. and wa la. my sweaty lids are no more. anyway last night i forgot to use it, weirdest thing. and i thought i would be fine. and then when i got home last night and looked in the mirror i was like AHHHHHHHHHHH! major black crease. worst. well all i'm saying is i will never do that again.

i went running for pretty much the first time since my accident. and boy was it painful. i was expecting it to be like riding a bike. like i would jump on that treadmill and just kill it. but it killed me. like slaughtered. the last two miles i felt like crying. sobbing. passing out right on the floor. i will always be an elliptical girl at heart. i'm not a runner. i'm an impostor. a poser.

i tried to delete my facebook today. too many crazy things have been happening on there. lots'o'drama. lemme tell yuh. anyway so i am trying to delete it and they practically told me that i'm not allowed to. like really, one of the boxes that showed up said "request not available". might as well have said "i own you melissa rae". i was so scared. i am so scared. so just warning all of you, facebook is a little smarter than we might have originally thought.


Friday, January 14, 2011

great life.

woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. i was walking around cursing the day in my head. i know, not good, you know you are about to have the worst day when friday's don't even look good anymore. anyway so i'm walking around throwing stuff and breaking glass and kicking holes in the wall. and then i stopped all the sudden. and just started saying all the awesome things in my life. and before i knew it, i literally could not stop. and then i was smiling. and then all the sudden i knew that today will be my best day.

i promised some girls at work that i would go to zumba with them. it was one of those times where i was allllll about it and then as i walked away i was like CRAP! i do not want to do that at all. zumba? me? i can barely make walking look easy and now i think i'm gonna be able to dance? for exercise? well i'll let you know how it goes. hopefully i'll be so good at it.

it was my baby sisters birthday yesterday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! she is so great and so fun. i really like her. and i know she will make the greatest mama to baby boop bop in her belly. i love that girl. plus she made the greatest cake. lemon cake. yuuuummmmm. oh and, i can barely type this next part without laughing. my dad gave her the greatest present. it was a piece of paper that looked like a check. made out for "4 hours of baby satting, no mins". sooo funny. and so cute.

i think i might have an obsessive personality (thanks mom!). especially when it comes to youtube videos. i find one i like and then i can't stop watching it. recently i found the greatest song on there. i listen to it at least five times a day. it's a remix of a jay-z song and a dolly parton song. oops.

i went to the jazz game this week. it was soooo fun. we sat behind the basket so we got those slap stick things that you use to distract them when they make free throws. it was the best time.

welllll. that's it i think. hope everyone has their best day ever.

Monday, January 10, 2011

do and don't.

don't live with crazy people. trust me.

don't poop too much in the toilet at my apartment. it will clog.

don't eat more than one fiber one bar in any 24 hour period. or you'll find out how reliable above toilet really is.

don't wear open toed shoes in the winter.

do scrape your sidewalks always. ice is the scariest.

do go to sleep before 11 pm when you work an 8-5.

do laugh a lot.

do get really pissed if you have to.

do play a lot of words with friends.

Thursday, January 6, 2011


saw the fighter last night. and i was pleasantly surprised. i had fully intended to sleep through it. but was hooked the second i realized everyone had a boston accent. i can't stop talking like a bostonian, obviously.

during the holidays, my mom always sets out a puzzle for everyone to work on. i have never really understood the point of puzzles. so i never work on them. plus she makes a rule that if you touch one of the puzzle pieces you have to stick around until you've placed five pieces in their rightful spot. pffffttt yeah right, like i wanna do that. so i usually just eat to keep myself entertained. this christmas i accidentally touched one and then all the sudden i couldn't stop. i was addicted. spent two hours on that thing. had to finally be dragged out of the room kicking and screaming.

i forgot my phone today. i'm dying. sorry to anyone i am in the middle of a words with friends game. i won't be able to play a word til later. way bummer.

k bye.